Introduction
Am I a good parent? This question resonates with countless parents worldwide at some stage in their lives. What truly makes a good parent? Is it someone who nurtures a bond of friendship with their children? Is it the one who shares meals with them, prays with them, and navigates the routines of school, church, and doctor's appointments? Is it the one who indulges in sports with their kids? Or has the essence of parenthood been diminished to fulfilling only the financial obligations for children – paying school fees, supplying educational materials, catering to their various needs and wants?
The Core of Good Parenting
Being a good parent transcends just meeting financial obligations or playing games with the children. It combines all these elements and more. During their formative years, children often perceive their parents as role models, mimicking their attitudes and behaviours. Therefore, as parents, we must exemplify the principles of good conduct that we aspire our children to embody. However, extremes are unproductive – being overly permissive by conceding to every demand, or exercising unyielding discipline for minor mistakes, is counterproductive.
The Parenting Balancing Act
The goal is to find a delicate balance, to act as authoritative guides without becoming dictatorial figures. Another aspect that intertwines itself into family dynamics is favouritism. A common notion is that either the eldest or the youngest child receives the majority of parental love. The middle child, especially in a family of three children, might feel neglected, receiving less love than the cherished first-born who initiated the parents' journey into parenthood, or the youngest, typically coddled and often referred to affectionately as "Baby". In light of this, the middle child may consider themselves the black sheep of the family,
the one misunderstood and overlooked. It is our job as parents to ensure that every child feels equally loved and understood.
Striking the Balance between Friendship and Parental Role
While a parent-child friendship is crucial, it should not overshadow the fundamental parental role or lead to overindulgence. We need to balance between being a friend and a parent, truly listening to our children and giving them room to express their opinions. Yes, we are adults with more life experience, but we should avoid the pitfall of assuming we always know best.
Conclusion
The essence of being a good parent is one who listens, understands, and guides with love and wisdom. Our children might be navigating situations we have never faced. We must first understand their issues to guide them effectively.
I invite you to join this conversation and share your experiences in navigating this delicate balance between our desires as parents and the needs of our children. Let's support each other in our parenting journeys. Your insights might just be the torchlight someone else needs in their path of parenthood.
Remember, a good conversation begins with a willingness to share and listen. Let's make this a space where we can learn from each other's experiences and grow together in our parenting journey.
#MamasReflectiveMusings #NiteTanzarn #HazeYouthParenting #ParentingInsights #GoodParenting #ParentingTogether
About the Author: Nite Tanzarn is an Independent International Consultant, with a strong commitment to advocating for women’s rights. As a devoted parent, she is well-versed in the challenges of raising children. Through personal anecdotes and reflective musings, Nite aims to share insights, tips, and strategies to aid other parents on their journey.
One tip I can share as a parent is that you should be loving without spoiling your children
Being a good role model is important because children learn by example.
Thank you for sharing.